Foes of football in Australia outlawed

Another tumultuous week in the media for the A-League where the anti-football bias has once again poked its head out of its metaphorical shell. Water off a turtles back by now, surely?

Yes, but it still needs to stop.

Here at The Football Sack we're speeding up the process of removing anti-football bias by outlawing all those who show it. This Ye Oldé reaction is a tried and true measure to ensure our game succeeds. We're actually not sure why it was ever done away with in the first place.

So put on your cowboy boots, start shooting into the air, and welcome the new law in town. By order of the self-appointed local sheriff's office, who are tired of refraining from pettiness, all football haters are henceforth outlawed.

Tom Elliot, 3WA Melbourne
This chap believes football is boring. Yes. This chap. We were befuddled at his accompanying rant on Twitter and outraged at his alleged statement on air in regards to the Hillsborough disaster.  
Status: Outlawed.

Nova 937, Perth
Not all of Nova. Just 937 and the employee who posted a snipe at football in the form of a question on Facebook. All we hear is static.  

Managing Director Gary Roberts has since apologied for the status update:

Status: Pardoned.

Rita Panahi, Herald Sun, Melbourne
Seems blissfully unaware of her apparently biased agenda. Will quickly label you a troll if you dare call her on it.
Status: Outlawed.